I was so happy when I received the following from June, but saddened when I read about her painful losses. When I went to the hospital in Midland, Texas to give birth to my daughter Carajean, Bob (Burton) and I dropped off my son Craig at June and Grady's house to play with their son Tommy. That was 47 years ago this November 1st.
"I apologize for not getting back to you, but I have just spent the last most physically painful period of my life during the months preceding and during this summer. I am still recovering from having the three lower discs in my back remade and fused, as they were bone to bone; and the recovery has been both painful and long, and I still have many months to go. Otherwise, I would not have missed this wonderful event and the joy of being there with all of you.
I live in Tulsa right now, but as soon I am well enough and my home is sold, my son, Chris, and I will be moving to Edmond just north of Oklahoma City to be near my son, Scott, his wife Staci and their two children Braden and Morgan. I can no longer work with my current health problems; and it's time to be a "hands on" grandma at last. All my other grandchildren are much too grown up now to really care whether or not I attend their ball games, plays, etc., but these two are not yet that "old and jaded". Ha. Scott went to the University of Oklahoma, and after graduation stayed in that city to marry my wonderful daughter-in-law, who is a special education teacher in the Edmond School District. Anyway, I'm looking forward to a change after 27 years in Tulsa, which I have truly loved. I will hate leaving my Presbyterian Church here (one that is very inclusive) but will soon find another in Oklahoma City where there are several very liberal churches, some Presbyterian, some interdenominational.
My Darling Grady died of melanoma cancer on October 22, 1991, and life has never been the same for me. He was my soulmate and very best friend, and I still miss him every single day.
My son, Tom, died in 2001 of liver failure. He was the divorced father of three daughters: Elizabeth, who is now 27 and has three children of her own; Katie June, 23 years old, and recently returned from Iraq (emotionally if not physically battered) and Danielle, 21, and recently married in St. Louis. Tom's illness was long and very painful, and I could not begrudge him the release after having suffered for so long.
Martha, who is in Flower Mound just North of Dallas, lives there with her husband, Kerry, and their two daughters, Karen and Kayle, 18 and 14, respectively. They are both employed by Wells Fargo Mortgage Corporation (she, a mortgage broker--he a computer analyst) and have done very well there. My daughter has become a very dear friend to me in every way once we got past the teen conflict years that mothers and daughters sometimes have.
My darling Kevin has always been closest to me in many ways than any of my children. We have pretty much always been able to communicate even without words and his command of words is pretty awesome. He graduated from Baylor University (where a great deal of his anguish over his sexuality took place). He now also works for Wells Fargo Mortgage in Minneapolis, but is an author and has one published book which targets problems in the gay underground community and is at work on a second one. His journey to Michael, his beloved, has been long and painful. I thank God for protecting him all along this very difficult journey to the joyful life he now has. Michael is a representative for several men designer products to department stores and travels back and forth to New York City quite a lot. They love travel and have been to Europe, Mexico, and many of the islands several times. For my 65th birthday, they gave me a all-expense paid week in Paris, and acted as my escorts and translators. We had such a wonderful time, and I will never forget that wonderful week.
Christopher, 39, is my youngest son, and is employed as a sergeant with a security firm at the Spirit Plant here is Tulsa. They build segments of the new Boeing Dreamliner airplane. He is divorced and has moved back with me. There were no children in this very troubled marriage, and he is healing at long last.
I have very aggressive arthritis which resulted finally in my three lower discs being so non-existent that everything was bone on bone, resulting in a kind of agony brand new to me during the first six months of this year. On June 4, my wonderful neurosurgeon rebuilt all three of these lower discs and fused them with screws and rods. I also have a mass on my upper spine which he did not touch at this time, but will watch carefully with MRIs for the next few years. He assured me that if I continue to lose some excess weight (and I have put on quite a bit through pain-enforced inactivity), the surgery should last for 10 to 12 years before the arthritis catches up with me again. That's very good news--I'm a great believer in quality over quantity of life, and I thank God for this surgery. However, it is a long and painful recovery, and I'm trying very hard to be patient and diligent in doing all I can to recover as much mobility as possible. Enough of that! In short--I'm doing great!
Well, I must stop. You probably are completely exhausted from reading this by now. It was sooooo good to hear from you and about you. Let's please keep contact by emails (I dearly love email, and my computer is the first and last place I go each morning and night).
Have a wonderful day!!"
With love,
June
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